So you wanna know how that person seems to have it all together? Is there someone in your everyday life who you seem to be really impressed by and want to know what the secret is to their togetherness, especially when you feel like a mess most of the time?
Well unfortunately there is no big secret. However, there are habits that many successful people swear by that we will share with you today.
Social Expertise
People that are successful tend to have a big network of people around them. In order to do that they would’ve had to learn some social skills. Now some people are born very outgoing with amazing charm and wit, but chances are that many had to practice and learn.
I hear about a lot of people struggling socially, especially after the pandemic. I truly believe that practice makes perfect, and that socializing is a skill we all can learn and improve on.
You can start by reading self-help books or blogs about making small talk and networking. Specific social skills that are beneficial to work on are listed below:
- Empathy
- Active listening
- Small talk
- Asking open-ended questions
- Emotional intelligence
- Body language
On top of these 6 important social skills, I would also consider practicing. Practice being calm and collected while you ask someone some questions in a casual conversation. Practice your language and body language. Having a bit of humor and charisma can go a long way, and the more you practice, the better you’ll become.
Surround Yourself With People Who Inspire You
Most people are directly impacted by those they are surrounded by. People that hang around smokers are more likely to smoke. People that hang around obese people with bad eating habits, increase your chances of following in their footsteps. This is called social contagion.
Therefore, surrounding yourself with people who are more like who you’d like to become, will increase your chances of their good influences rubbing off onto you.
Like Minded People Support Each Other
If your goal is to climb out of the working class and bring yourself up into the middle class, for example, spending more time with people who have achieved your goalswill increases your chances of meeting those goals, or even just people who aspire to reach similar goals of financial improvement. However, if you continue to spend all your time constantly with people who have no interest in bettering their financial situation, it will be extremely hard to pull yourself out of that mentality and make a change in your life. So, make an effort to make friends with people of similar interests and mindsets.
Of course, some people are in situations that are out of their control, but if you set a goal and know that with hard work you can achieve it, then you shouldn’t let anything get in your way!
Socialize and Build Your Network
This is where networking comes in handy. The power to socialize and create relationships with new and different people is key. So keep reading your books and blogs about developing social skills, and even consider taking classes such as toastmasters to increase your confidence and public speaking. If you can face your fear of public speaking, a few individuals will be nothing.
Always Be Learning
It’s important to continue to challenge your brain, even out of school. This can include learning a new hobby or skill. It can really help if you continue to learn more about your current job. That is a great way to show your employers that you are up to date in the industry and worthy of that promotion.
Never Stop Improving
Even if you’re somebody who is excelling at their career, and everything seems to be very stable – boring even, you could benefit strongly from continuing your education in anything. Learn a new language, improve your public speaking skills, practice an instrument, improve on your computer/IT skills, or garden. There are so many things that we would benefit from learning.
You don’t want to feel like your life is stuck in the same routine, which is why learning something can give you some new motivation, and hopefully something fun to enjoy.
Wake Up Early
Waking up early can really improve your day. It gives you so much time to properly wake up before starting your work day. Rather than just rushing with your brain barely awake. You can actually utilize the morning to work in your favour.
You can use this time for self reflection, take your time making your breakfast. Not feel so rushed. Take the time to watch the sun rise, that can be a very motivating feeling as you watch the sky go from dark to light.
By waking up earlier, you can take time to organize your day, get your exercise in, reflect and journal, and enjoy that quietness before the rest of the world wakes up.
Stay Organized
Without taking time to get your life organized, and maintain that organization, you will likely be feeling like a bit of a mess quite often. This is why organization is so important. Whether you’re in school, a working professional, or a house husband.
We all need to get our goals, priorities, and finances organized. This can include journalling and recording your to-do lists for the day, week, and month. If we want to accomplish our goals we really should be writing down that they are, and the steps required to turn those goals into a reality.
Write Down Your Goals
Ideally we want those goals written out somewhere we can see them regularly. It’s so easy to forget about our goals or the direction we’re suppose to be going, which is why we need to make sure our goals are put in front of us unintentionally. I personally like to stick a piece of paper next to my bedroom vanity so I can see my goals without trying to.
While to-do lists can be really beneficial, I find it easy to go overboard when writing down all the things I want to get done in a short period of time. Then procrastination sets in as I look as this massive unrealistic to-do list.
Practice Effective To-Do List Habits
Benefit from to-do lists by making one that has a general list of things you want to do, but without a general deadline. Keep a second to-do list of things to do over the next two days, including urgent things such as appointments. I recommend you do not put too many things on your list. If anything, keep a very small urgent list, and instead add an item once you run out. This way you will feel like you’re way ahead, instead of constantly behind.
Organize Your Finances
Don’t forget to keep your finances organized! There are many self help books that can give you great financial advice and teach you how to manage your money. But generally, it’s always good to keep a budget. Try to be ahead of your payments and never behind.
Prioritize saving for an emergency fund for any rainy days that could occur. I believe it’s recommended to have emergency savings to cover about 3 months of expenses. This is in case you lose your job, find yourself injured and unable to work, or just something goes off plan that requires the use of some unexpected large sum of money.
There is a lot more involved in financial organization and money responsibility, so make sure to learn from an expert about what you can do to always be financial responsible.
Think Long Term
It can be easy to fall susceptible to focusing on instant gratification, rather than meeting long-term goals. This is why it’s so important to write out our goals somewhere we can easily see them without trying to. This could be having them written somewhere in view while you’re brushing your teeth. Make the list your phone’s wallpaper so you see it constantly. If you’re struggling with this you could even set reminders on your phone to remind you to read over your goals and get your mind focused.
Stay On Track
Set a time every morning, maybe during breakfast, where you put your phone away and remind yourself of your goals. Manifest what you want to achieve or gain daily, and this will encourage you to work harder to go and get it. Consistency is key in achieving almost anything, which is why it’s so important to remind ourselves of what we want to acheive on a very regular basis.
Eat a Healthy Diet
I could go on and on about the connection between eating right and our success and happiness. What we put into our bodies is so important. There’s a reason why people who eat too much junk food and nothing our bodies need, tend to turn into couch potatoes and not get much exersize, eventually causing them to gain an unhealthy amount of weight.
Consider the Nutrition of What You’re Putting in Your Body
But it doesn’t just affect our physical health. What we eat controls the amounts of each nutrient we are getting, and if we aren’t getting enough of something we need it can affect our mental health as well. This can affect us in every area of our lives, including our social lives, our financial health, our productivity at work, our happiness, and many more.
If you’re serious about getting your shit together, then you will prioritize eating better. As long as you have a balanced diet and are meeting your nutritional needs, that is good enough!
Exercising
Now when we say exercising it doesn’t have to mean an hour long gym sesh every morning. It can be something super simple like a walk. If you work from a computer all day, stand up for awhile and do your work that way. There are so many ways to get in exercise that don’t have to be something you don’t enjoy.
Find an Activity You Love
Many people can find something they love if they try, such as swimming, walking, basketball, volleyball, etc. There are so many possibilities. If you’re sedentary most of the day you may even notice it affects your sleep. I find that if I’ve been sitting on my bum all day, at night time I’m way to restless to sleep. I will have to get up, do some squats just to make my legs relax enough to sleep.
Improve Your Self-Confidence
Exercising with help to increase your self worth, you’ll know that you’re doing the right thing and it will boost your confidence, helping you to get your shit together. Focus on all the important things you want to achieve in your life – will you be able to accomplish them if you’re not healthy enough? Thats a bit of a dramatic example but it’s true. I have spent, and am still spending so much effort into making my life last. So no excuse is going to stop me from not doing everything I can to extend my life and physical health.
Boost Your Energy
Not to mention the energy you get from exercising. You may not feel like energy while you’re working out, but you will throughout the day. That energy could help boost your productivity at work, hopefully in a way that will stand out to your company. Small steps like these could really help you achieve your goals and get your shit together.
There are so many other benefits to exercising beyond what I’ve described. Just remember that you don’t have to do any of this. No one is making you. But if you truly want to make that change, and resemble the successful people who have their shit together, you’ll spend some time doing the best things for yourself!
Prioritize Sleep
I’m sure by now we’ve all heard about how not getting enough sleep really reduces our brain’s capacity to work at its full potential. If we aren’t making sure we get enough sleep we are causing a lot of harm to ourselves, and reducing the chances of us achieving our goals. It may be tempting to stay up all night to get ahead of the competition, but the reality is you would only be causing more harm than good.
Many people struggle to sleep, so following good sleeping habits is just as important. We all know that the blue light from our phones and TV’s affect our ability to fall asleep, so turn your devices off about an hour before bedtime. Decide on a set bedtime and wakeup time and stick to it everyday. It’s okay if you need to make adjustments, the goal is to be consistent in these times. Start prioritizing sleep and you will notice a big difference in so many areas of your life.
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